Ok, so this is probably not the ‘ultimate’ guide to adulting but it’s a pretty good one and it’s based on first-hand experience.
In the years I’ve been a coach and also in living my own life, there are some big lessons which myself and my clients wish we’d known and understood when we were younger.
I hear this a lot “I wish this was taught in school.” Whilst in many cases I agree, there is also a level of life experience that’s required to have the maturity to work on ourselves.
I’m writing this post for women in my target demographic. You are most likely ambitions, tenacious, in your 30’s+ and want to live a great life. I’m sharing some key lessons in this guide to adulting with tips on how to instil some of these into your current life.
There are so many elements that I could have included in this guide to adulting so I’ve picked a few that resonate the most with my clients. Each of these points weave into each other.
When we aren’t disciplined, we tend to float through life almost as a passenger to it. You are more susceptible to being influenced by others and rarely commit to yourself. This is linked to many factors like self-worth (putting yourself first) through to how you were raised but as an adult today, I offer you this.
If you can define what you want your life to look like, make every effort to commit to that. This will help you to stay focussed and over time, you’ll be living in your vision.
Examples of a lack of discipline when we were younger look like: going out even though you don’t have money/ are tired/ don’t like people. In adulthood it can look like: ‘keeping up with the Jones’s’/ chasing bling/ searching for happiness in having more.
When you are intentional, your actions will reflect this. Intention in this guide to adulting relates to why you do something and is therefore linked to a purpose. Not necessarily life purpose. Here, you choose to do things that are aligned with your big vision of a fulfilling life and ignore the rest.
For example, if you wanted to move to the next stage in your career, you might need to train. Instead of spending every weekend socialising, you might intentionally commit to two weekends of socialising a week. This is so that you are able to complete your training with ease. Discipline helps you to be intentional.
This is a big one in your guide to adulting and actually the one I wish was taught in schools. Being self-aware is simply knowing who you are and living your life aligned with your values. This is hard. It’s even harder as you get older and start to be ‘set in your ways’ but you need to challenge yourself.
Without self-awareness there is no guide to adulting. It is the be all and end all of your personal development because you are in control. Knowing yourself isn’t the most fun experience of your life but I promise you, with commitment and patience, you will revolutionise and essentially transform your life in ways you could have never imagined.
“Consistency is the DNA of mastery” – Robin Sharma
Don’t be scared by the word “mastery” because it merely means “comprehensive knowledge or skill.” You’re competent so mastery is achievable. In order to be consistent though, you need to commit to your vision (discipline). You need to know why (intention) and you need to know who you are, what you stand for and show that in your actions (self-awareness.)
Consistency also means to commit to the small steps every day that will lead to your bigger goals in life. Without these small steps, nothing is possible (unless you’re a billionaire or privileged in another way.) So be patient with your journey. Allow yourself the time and space to achieve a brilliant life through each intentional, disciplined and self-aware step you take.
Puja McClymont – certified coach, wisdom teacher, speaker and host of the SELF Care 101 podcast.
As a life and leadership coach, I help mission-driven individuals who are seeking direction, to gain clarity, by expanding their inner awareness through the ancient wisdom teachings of Ayurveda and Yoga; so that they can lead more purposeful and fulfilling lives.
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